Beautiful Disaster
by Hlbur14
Summary: Nick's view at the end of Cooler - I know I know, everyone is doing one of these, but I can't help it! Please read! :D


**I don't care that loads of people with probably be doing these one shots, but come on, it was a BIG EVENT! Jess and Nick locked lips! They freaking KISSED you guys! How could I help myself?!**

**As you can all imagine, I practically screamed when I saw them kiss. It was so perfect! So much passion and lust and desire, it was everything I ever wanted it to be! I don't even care that my last fic was way off from the way these two are going!**

**Again, this is in Nick's point of view, but I find him to be fascinating when it comes to Jess, especially in this episode. So I wrote the kiss in his point of view, since he was the one who initiated it (with perfection might I add).**

**Hope you enjoy, and let me know what you think!**

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Maybe it was when she said she needed me.

Maybe it was when she created Strip True American.

Maybe it was when she admitted that she thought I was 'smokin' hot'.

Maybe it was when Sam said "Well... he's missing out."

Whatever it was, I was driven forward to kiss her. Jessica Day, the most bizarre, quirky, beautiful girl I have ever met. After so many opportunities, as many longing glances and secret smiles, I finally did the forbidden.

Don't get me wrong, I've thought about kissing her more than once, but there was never a right opportunity. Jess wasn't just any ordinary girl; she was so much more. Kissing her would be the element of a dream, and the idea of kissing her inappropriately actually created a pang in my head. So when everyone was chanting for us to lock lips, all I could think was 'not like this'. I couldn't. If I was going to kiss her, it had to be in a world where it was just _us. _But then it occurred to me that maybe I would never get an opportunity again, at least, not a correct one.

So, after inspecting the strange scratching noise that turned out to be a rouge dog, Jess and I walked back toward our rooms. We joked a little about the trench coat I had been wearing all day and night, mostly her mocking me, and it was during this that I planned my assault. Now was as good as any. Living in the loft meant that it was hardly ever quiet, so that meant getting Jess alone would be near impossible. I vaguely remembered Sam who was sleeping in her room, and for a moment I thought better. But then she turned to go to her room, wishing me goodnight, and I couldn't handle it. Sam vanishes from my mind and the danger of his presence. The complexity of what I was about to do was now forgotten.

I grabbed her elbow, reeled her in, and kissed her with everything I had.

I never expected it to be as passionate as it was. In fact, I half expected her to push me away. But no, her lips moulded with mine as if it were meant to be, her arms wrapping around my neck and her body pushing against mine. This action on her part killed me for a moment, and I delved deeper into the kiss. I had to, this was my only shot. I encircled her with my arms, trapping her to me as I fused our lips together, our breathes mingling with deep passion.

Oh, that passion. It set my body on fire, inside and out. Every touch, every breath, every movement had my mind exploding with need. All I could think about was that Jess and I were kissing, and that I could have kissed her for forever and a day. She reacted to me so positively it only motivated me more, and it took all I had to not guide her to my room and take it to the next level. Her scent exploded around me, her lips so desperate against mine I could have made myself believe that she cared for me as much as I did for her. Her hands felt like they were everywhere. Also, I have to say it, she was an incredible kisser! She wasn't awkward or gentle, none of that crap; she was all lust and passion.

When I snapped into what was unfortunately reality, I pulled away. I pressed my forehead to hers, but I couldn't help myself. I lowered my mouth to hers again, but restrained myself, planting two gentle kisses on her lips rather than losing myself again. Again I could feel her responding, gentle and willing, and my god she made it hard for me to pull away. However, I hoped that those two little kisses were loud with their meaning; that Jess was more than a stupid, drunken game to me. The first kiss expressed all my desire, _our desire, _which was good, but to be less passionate and more loving meant so much more. I hoped she knew that, because it was the best I could do.

"I meant something like that." I whispered, relishing the closeness that I was about to pull out from. God, I didn't want to move away. I wanted to kiss her again, and not just her lips. I want to kiss her creamy skin and caress her slender body. I wanted to rummage my hands through her hair. I wanted to feel her legs around my waist as I carried her to my room. I wanted to kiss every aspect of her body, right down to the childhood scars she no doubt possessed. I wanted to fuse us together, not just by mouth to mouth.

But I couldn't. I _wouldn't. _

So I pulled away, letting her breath whisper across my face one last time and allowing one last smell of her scent. I turned around and strode into my room, refusing to look back in case I lost whatever control I still maintained.

Slamming the door, I collapsed on my bed, running my hands down my face. Logic told me that I would regret what I did, but I wouldn't allow myself to believe that. I had never regretted meeting Jess. I had never regretted sacrificing my time in aid of hers. I had never regretted turning my back on Caroline for her! It was all for Jess, all of it. She was someone worth coming back for.

There was no way in hell I would be sorry for kissing her.

The mumblings of Sam outside suddenly enraged me. I forgot about him, the bastard! What kind of boyfriend was he? He had _insisted _on me and Jess kissing in the game! Jess deserved someone better, someone who cared about her, who wanted her all to himself, who...

I realised I was touching my lips, licking them to claim that last taste of her. Who did Jess belong to? Me? Ha! I fought off the urge to be jealous, as I had no right. I was the one in the wrong here; I kissed a taken girl. However, despite myself, I walked to the door and pressed my ear to the wood, trying to catch Jess's voice. When I did, she sounded breathless, and that alone made me grin. I may have broken the rules, but to hear the effect I'd had on her was good enough.

That grin immediately fell when I heard her door close. Sighing, I retreated to my own bed, my body remarkably still on fire. What was she doing to me? Me, the coward who never took risks, who kept away from the haunted houses? She had gotten under my skin so much so that it had driven me to kiss her with such surprise it even shocked me! She was killing me without even trying, killing me softly, killing me with perfection.

And honestly? I gladly caved in to her assaults of innocence and googly eyes. I surrendered myself to her because I wanted to. I let myself become aflame by her mere touch because the pain was worth it. I let myself relive that kiss as I drifted to sleep because it was so agonizingly perfect that it was worth every emotional pain she could throw at me.

She was Jess Day.

I was Nick miller.

Together, we were a beautiful disaster. And, most importantly, I _loved _it.

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**I know it was short, but there's only so much you can write about in a scene that was merely under a minute long!**

**Let me know what you think! :D**


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